My second pick for February was Emergency Contact by Mary H.K. Choi. Since our protagonists basically live on caffeine, a coffee and croissant felt only fitting.
An Invisibility Cloak for Two
In high school, Penny Lee felt generally invisible. Ever the forgotten friend, she floated along with decent classmates and an okay boyfriend, but she never felt truly seen. In fact, Penny herself hardly knew who she was. When she jets off for college in Austin, Texas, she’s determined to become a true writer, and maybe survive along the way. Socializing and college fun don’t concern her much - she’s just ready to escape.
In parallel, Sam is barely scraping by. Battling a painful breakup and serving up coffee every day, he can’t afford real rent, and lives above the café he works at. Lost in a swirl of insecurity and angst, he’s not looking for friends - he wants to prove himself to his ex and get out of the coffee shop. He knows he’s destined for bigger things, and he'll get there, no matter the cost.
The two protagonists cross paths just as Sam is suffering a bout of heat exhaustion and dehydration, and Penny finds him collapsed on the ground. The two exchange phone numbers in the event of another untimely heat stroke in the road, and they jokingly become emergency contacts. Over time, they grow to mean much more to one another, and the two learn that it’s okay to be vulnerable and imperfect. And, more importantly, you don’t have to go through life alone.
“You can be with the same person for a long time and have it be fine and meet someone else who instantly makes you see that it's broken.”
To Like, or Not to Like
I’ll be honest. I totally judged this book by its cover. The print and the illustrations are just so pretty - can you blame me?
As much as I wanted to root for her, Penny felt pretentious and judgmental throughout most of the novel. She’s full of 20-something angst and a sense of superiority that I’m sure many students enter college with. In truth, I had to work hard to like her. Instead, it was the writing style and the draw of the side characters that kept me invested. And Sam wasn’t particularly likeable, either. Although, for some reason it’s far easier to romanticize a moody, judgy 21-year-old guy? Might need to unpack that later. In fact, he and Penny were largely selfish in their relationships with others, especially with Jude.
I did appreciate some elements of their characterization. H.K. Choi shed a necessary light on depression and anxiety, especially in young people today. It was clear to see that Penny and Sam were flawed characters, but they were also constantly battling intrusive thoughts and self-doubt. So, maybe some of their holier-than-thou moments were wrought not by genuine sentiments of superiority, but by deep insecurities? I’d like to spin it that way, but I’m not totally sure. It’s hard to recognize and combat our internalized misogyny - or in Penny’s case, to see that every woman is more complex than her appearance, and has inherent worth regardless of how we choose to perceive her. It’s easy to succumb to stereotypes and accept what society tells us to think of others. I just wish Penny had fought harder to actually know and understand Jude and Mallory rather than misuse them because they're not as “intelligent.”
Penny’s entrance into the college experience and her realization that no one knows who she truly is - not even Penny, herself - is jarring, but not unlike many other high school graduates’. When you’re just friends with the people around you based on proximity and lean into the role you’re given, suddenly discovering you have a blank slate and the opportunity to discover who you truly are is scary. What if you don’t like who you were, or who you are now?
As a result of her blinding insecurity and profound fear of being known (and rejected), Penny is incredibly closed-off to even her roommate. It makes sense that she feels like she can be more open with someone digitally and express her feelings to a faceless screen. Her dynamic with Sam removed the pressure of choice or rejection, replacing both with simple comradery and limited contact. And I enjoyed the moments where they communicated solely through texting. It felt real (if a little unrealistically slang-heavy) and I could see the romance blooming on the page. This dialogue was often more effective than their actual face-to-face interactions, which makes it more funny and real. It probably is awkward meeting someone in the flesh after talking to them online for months. Like, you know this person to their core but you can hardly associate their face with their personality. I also enjoyed the alternating narration style that switched between Penny and Sam’s perspectives. I grew a little more sympathetic to Sam and slightly more understanding toward Penny though this structure.
My central qualms: Penny’s mom deserved better! In this house, we don’t stand for slut-shaming, much less mom-shaming. I know parents can be embarrassing, but from where I’m sitting, her mother was constantly trying to give Penny a better life and show her she loved her as best she could. Also - and I notoriously hate this trope - it felt like Penny only discovered who she was because of a boy. Why must a guy be the one helping female protagonists find themselves? Penny could have - and should have - learned to stand on her own two feet and navigate herself on her own. These circumstances force me to wonder how much of Penny’s final persona is her own, and how much of it was influenced by her desire to be liked by Sam. UGH. I want answers, Mary H.K. Choi.
If anything, her new friends Jude and Mallory could have helped her understand what she wants in life, and pushed her out of her comfort zone. Friendships can define boundaries, celebrate common interests, and offer support. (Plus, Jude just deserved better in general.) Platonic relationships also just tend to be more empowering, in my opinion, especially between women. But I get how gaining a guy’s interest can feel affirming and make you feel seen, blah blah blah. It just irks me, and it’s not very healthy!
This book earns about 3.5 stars from me - I love getting more college coming-of-age stories, but this novel left me a little disappointed. While it captures the quintessential angst of the late teens and early 20s, I found it so difficult to root for our protagonists and navigate the narrative structure. The modern relationship-building via text made Penny and Sam come to life, but each character needed a little more development to really stand on their own. I'd recommend this novel to readers who enjoyed Yes, No, Maybe So, Beach Read, or Loveboat, Taipei.
Flaky is a Good Thing
I loved Sam's affinity for baking. In truth, I just love the idea of any guy baking or working in a coffee shop. I feel like you need a certain vibe to work in that environment each day, and I trust that vibe. And I'll admit that the coffee shop (and Jude) brought an important relationship to fruition between Sam and Penny. They needed to learn from each other, and they did. What did I learn, you ask? Coffee shops (and customers' behavior in them) are great indicators of character and can be a beautiful starting point for a relationship.
My dalliance this week was with an almond croissant and a sweet cream cold brew coffee. Perhaps one day I'll have the courage, time, and money to replicate this croissant recipe and its countless layers of pastry and butter, but not this time.
I found this somewhat simplified recipe that calls for premade puff pastry dough, which certainly cuts down on prep time and ingredients. Until I feel as comfortable in the kitchen as Sam, I'll make it my goal to try this one out:
Ingredients:
For the almond cream (frangipane) :
3 tablespoons very soft butter
¼ cup granulated sugar
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
¼ teaspoon almond extract
½ cup almond flour
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
For the egg wash:
1 large egg
1 teaspoon water
For the croissants:
17.25- ounce package of purchased puff pastry (2 sheets)
For finishing:
½ cup sliced almonds
powdered sugar for sprinkling
Is there anything better than warm frangipane on a cold wintry morning? I'd like to see proof.
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